I just got a fancy new MacBook Pro and the good news is that everything on the Internet now looks WAY better. The bad news is that I don’t remember most of the Mac keyboard shortcuts that I knew in my previous life and I keep highlighting, double clicking and deleting just about everything. So if this blog post actually makes it to the public sphere, well then…SWEET. Do you like how I refer to this blog as the “public sphere” as if there’s more than four people who read it? HAHAHAHA I know, right.
Anyways, K. is away at some little music festival Sasquatch thing and I’m on “vacation” in a city basically next door to my own. But it counts as a real vacation because I’ve spent about 80% of my time here drunk and not knowing where I am.
It’s almost summer (late May/early June still doesn’t count as summer where we live because it snowed on Thursday…so, anything can happen) and that means a multitude of different things:
- I’m not nearly in as good of shape as I promised myself I would be.
- Drinking earlier and more often is about to become much more socially acceptable, dare I say expected.
- My skin is going to get approximately three shades darker and so I must prepare myself for the inevitable onslaught of questions about my origins. I use this ambiguity to my advantage, however, by going to any and every cultural festival I can, passing myself off as one of their own so I can get free food.
- We can finally listen to summer-ish music without wanting to curl up and cry.
- Road trips. I should clarify; road trips without fearing for your life while taking anything even remotely resembling a turn at 5km/hour. Windows down, music blaring, driving too fast, ROAD TRIPS.
- Drinking deliciously cold Corona’s on a patio. For some reason Corona tastes like absolute piss in the winter but divine liquid gold in the summer. I’m pretty sure I’ve said this exact sentence on this blog before. Just thought I’d bring that up before you assholes do.
- Totally unrelated: I just made really awkward and prolonged eye contact for an inappropriate amount of time with one of those Mormon dudes who walks around with a name tag trying to convert you. I’m sitting at a gate in an airport right now, so THERE IS NO ESCAPE. K., this means if you find this post half-finished in the “Drafts” section I HAVE BEEN ABDUCTED AND FLOWN TO UTAH PLZ SEND HELP AND SNACKS.
YAY SUMMER! I’m about to go hide.